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Overview
Got this piece in an email forward from my Dad earlier, if you are a Malaysia and happen to so looooooove the Gown-Own-Ment, you should check it out. If you are not a Malaysian and would like to know how much we Malaysians looooooove the Gown-Own-Ment, then you should be interested in checking it out too.

幽默 - 讓國人最爽的六個 Malaysia 極品笑話
(Humour - 6 Exceptional Malaysia Jokes that Malaysians enjoy most)

1. 直升機 (Helicopter)
Pak Lah, Najib And Sami Vellu 同坐直升機巡視。
(Pak Lah, Najib and Sami Vellu riding helicopter scouting)

Sami Vellu 說：’如果我丟一千塊下去，撿到那一個人一定很高興。’
(Sami Vellu said: “If I throw a One Thousand Ringgit Note down there, the one who picked it up must be very happy.”)
[Note: One Thousand Ringgit Notes no longer exist]

Najib 說：’如果我丟兩張五百元下去，那就有兩個人很高興了。’
(Najid said: “If I throw Two Five Hundred Ringgit Notes down there, then there would be Two very happy person.”)

Pak Lah 說：’如果我丟十張一百元下去，就有十個人很高興了。’
(Pak Lah said: “If I throw Ten One Hundred Ringgit Notes, then got Ten People very happy.”)
[Note: Highest amount per note is One Hundred Ringgit]

這個時候 ……..
(At this moment ……..)

駕駛員喃喃自語地說：’何不把自己都丟下去，讓兩千一百萬人都高興呢？’
(Pilot mumbling: “Why not throw yourselves down there, let 21 Million people happy?”)
[Note: Malaysia's population is approximately 21 Million]

2. 郵票 (Stamp)
Sami Vellu 希望提高自己的聲望，想要發行一款有自己肖像的郵票…..
(Sami Vellu hoping to improve his reputation, wanted to release a set of stamps with his image …..)

發行過了一個多月之後，Sami Vellu 想要問看看視察看看銷路如何…..
(More than a month after release, Sami Vellu wanted to ask how the sales are doing …..)

Sami Vellu ： ‘銷售情形怎麼樣？’
(Sami Vellu: “How’s the sales status?”)

郵政總局局長：’還算不錯，只不過常常有人抱怨黏不牢！
(Post Office Head Officer: “Not bad, but often many people complained won’t stick firmly.”)
Sami Vellu ： ‘怎麼會呢？’ Sami Vellu 隨手拿了一張郵票，塗了一點口水在郵票背面，便試貼在信封上 ….
(Sami Vellu: “How come? Sami Vellu took a stamp, plastered some saliva on the backside of the stamp, then tried to stick it on an envelope ….)

Sami Vellu ：’ 這樣不是黏得很緊嗎？’
(Sami Vellu: “Ain’t this sticked on quite firm?”)

郵政總局局長： ‘可是……大家….都把口水吐在正面啊 ……’
(Post Office Head Officer: “But …… Everyone …. spat saliva on the front side oh ……”)
[Note: Sami Vellu's image is on the front site]

3. Najib vs Robber
深夜，Najib 去買宵夜，結果在路上遇到搶匪 …
(Night, Najib went to buy supper, met up with robber on the road …)

搶匪拿著槍指著 Najib 說：’ 把身上的錢交出來！’
(Robber holding a knife at Najib said: “Gimme all the money you have!”)

Najib 勃然大怒說：’你這什麼態度？我可是堂堂Vice Prime Minister 耶！’
(Najib angrily said: “What is this attitude of yours? I am the Vice Prime Minister leh!”)

搶匪：’喔，那……把我的錢還來。 ‘
(Robber: “Oh, then …… return my monies.”)
[Note: Corruption is a very common and popular practice over here in Malaysia]

4. Who is saved?
某天，Prime Minister 、Parliment members…等大官一起參加一個會議，結果發生連環車禍，送至醫院急救，記者們聞風趕至醫院….
(One day, Prime Minister, Parliment members … and many big officials participated a meeting together, but chain reactive car accident happened, sent to hospital for emergency rescue, reporters rushed to the hospital ….)

稍久，醫生出來了，記者忙著問’醫生！醫生！Prime Minister 有救嗎？’
(A while later, doctor came out, reporters quickly asked: “Doctor! Doctor! Can the Prime Minister be saved?”)

醫生沮喪的搖搖頭說：’唉 ..Prime Minister 沒救了…’
(Doctor shook his head sadly and said: “Aih .. Prime Minister cannot be saved …”)

記者又問：’醫生！醫生！Najib 有救嗎？’
(Reporters asked again: “Doctor! Doctor! Can Najib be saved?”)

醫生又沮喪的搖搖頭說：’唉 …也沒救了…’
(Doctor shook his head sadly again and said:”Aih … also cannot be saved …”)

記者就問：’那 …到底誰有救？’
(Reporters then ask: “Then … who can be saved?”)

醫生精神一振說： ‘Malaysia 有救了！’
(Doctor happily said: “Malaysia is saved!”)

5. Sami Vellu visits the Asylum
有一天Sami Vellu 往某家精神病院視察，所有的病人都站在走廊上高聲歡呼，
(One day Sami Vellu visits a particular asylum to check out the place, all the patients stood by the corridor loudly cheering at him.)

Sami Vellu 萬歲！Sami Vellu 萬歲！
(Long live Sami Vellu! Long live Sami Vellu!)
[Note: 萬歲 kinda means "long live" as 歲 means age while 萬 means Ten Thousand]

只有一名病人面無表情，對Sami Vellu 不理不睬。
(Only got one patient’s facial expression remain unchanged, not paying Sami Vellu any attention at all.)

Sami Vellu 看到了，問院長說：’那位病人為什麼不對我歡呼呢？’
(Sami Vellu saw that, asked the warden: “Why that patient did not cheer for me?”)

院長：’因為他今天精神非常正常。’
(Warden: “Because today his mental status is very normal.”)

6. Sami Vellu Campaigning Joy
一輛競選車載著Sami Vellu 競選團隊開到鄉村去造勢，不幸在山間小路上翻車。
(A campaigning car with Sami Vellu and his team of campaigners drove to a village to attract votes, unfortunately their car flipped on the hillside roads.)

正在農田作活的老農民看見這情景，就趕到出事地點，可是車上的人都死光了。
(An old farmer who was working on the fields saw that, rushed to the post, but all the people in the car died.)

于是他挖了一個土坑，把幾個政客都埋了。
(So he dug a hole, buried a few political members.)

過了幾天，負責事故勘察的警察找到那個老農民，問他那幾個政客到哪里去了，老農民說己經埋了。
(After a few days, a police inspector handling this case found the old farmer, asked him where are the few political members, old farmer told him already buried them.)

警察趕緊追問：’他們都死了嗎？ ‘
(Police quickly asked: “They were dead?”)

老農回答說：’嗯…，我看到Sami Vellu 在我埋他的時候大叫說他還沒死。’
(Old farmer replied: “Aye …，I saw Sami Vellu shouting out loudly that he have not died when I am burying him.)

警察說：’那你怎麼也把他埋了？’
(Police said: “Then how come you buried him as well?”)

老農說：’你知道的嘛? 這個Sami Vellu 從不說實話。
(Old Farmer said: “You know or not? This Sami Vellu never says the truth.”)

Deimos’s Daily Reads
Since this post is directly related to Malaysia, so once again the following articles are from fellow Malaysian Bloggers.

I am a pervert so let’s kick off with the ladies post:
Designer Jayhan shared some nice screenies of Shiratori Yuriko in Chinese Qi Pao.
Anime King Kenny has an cool shot of Eri Sawachika in bikini. Yummy!

Since I am a blogger, so these blogging related posts interests me:
Techie iCalvn stumbled upon a couple of kewl stumble exchange programs.
Check out his experience at his blog and if one is interested in joining, here is an invitation link for one of them:
http://stumbleudon.com/signup.php?r=916&c=e36jf9klny47d06e490c
If the link fails to work, let me know so I can provide another one.

Toys fanatic BaseGuardian shared his happy experience of receiving Stumble Traffic.

Smart mofo Wan Kong Yew shared his experience and some screenies at the Solomon Islands National Museum as well as an interesting story about a moon rock.

Deimos’s Thoughts
Good jokes. I like them all. Shows how much Malaysians love the Gown-Own-Ment.

Deimos Asks
For everyone: What do you think of the above jokes?
For Non Malaysians: What do you think of our country?
For Malaysians: What do you think about the 3 stars in the above stories?

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